How to deal with this anxiety and insecurity?
No. Please dont say that I should love myself or everyone is beautiful in their own way so that you dont have to feel insecure, or something like “Everything will be alright, it takes time but everything will be alright.”
Please. No. Everything isnt right from the first time it comes to my life.
I cant even think properly. I feel useless as if my existence is just a nuisance for everyone.
I do feel like I bother you A LOT and it comes to my mind more than once or twice.
Sometimes I think that disappear is better than keeps making everyone disappointed. I try my best but that's not enough.
In the end, everyone who comes will leave and I find myself alone, again.
That's why Im afraid to fall in love or to be loved. It's just a short feeling of happiness and in the end, I will feel broken, again.
Because it wont last forever. It just passed by.
I once believe in love but as time goes by, it only hurts me.
No one love me for who truly I am. Everyone just know the side that I want to show them.
In the end, I only have myself. I WILL NOT put my expectation or happiness in others.
I have RESPONSIBILITY for MY OWN HAPPINESS.